A crumb and the pebble.

Every man and woman is dealt a hand of cards. Everyone goes though a series of heartaches, losses, disappointments, failed expectations, and a few wild cards which is by far my personal favorite. But I don’t feel like capping all these cards right now, instead I’d like to share a very recent true story with all of you. Perhaps, it will encourage someone, or shed a light on “why”…

We all go through tough times. Some of us get it easier, others get it harder in life. And as much as we all love to sit down and magnify our wounds, and scars and beg the world for bandages at the mercy of every willing ear, there are a million people in the world who have it much harder…

Which is where I want to pause for a moment.

Just yesterday, I was selfishly playing an Israelite and complaining to God. We humans are so stupid sometimes and even in our prayers we try and draw pity out of God… ever noticed it in your prayers? We try to make God “feel” sorry for us… forgetting that all is His and for Him. Forgetting that He is the one allowing the pain or failure in our lives for a purpose that is His and surpasses our understanding. And instead of thanking Him for the wounds and tears we complain. Not realizing that these wounds are His blessings, His water, His manna for our lives. They are the marks that make us stronger and prepare us for His perfect future…

God doesn’t raise His children for an early retirement, but trains His children for a fight that lasts till the last breath is gone… and even that one is taken for faith. For Him. And is the strongest… I believe.

So here I was, doing the “why me” prayer and the “why so hard” and the “when is it over” prayer…

And suddenly as if on cue an ant, carrying a crumb nearly double his size ran by, near where my knee was… literally stopped for a moment and continued running.

He sharply distracted me from my prayer. And as I was about to return to my thoughts, a strong question pierced, as if my entire body, I even got the Goosebumps.

“What is heavier? The crumb on the ants back or the pebble that hangs around your neck?”

The question paralyzed me. But I didn’t have to answer it. I knew the answer. My painful prayer turned into a “I am such a stupid woman” smile.

And I wished Jesus would walk out so I could give Him a big hug for being so patient with me.

See, the truth is.. The crumb the ant carries on his back is much heavier than the pebble I wear around my neck.

In this simple everyday life example God explained to me, that His justice isn’t ours. We see the crumb and the pebble and we judge. God sees the ant and the man. And he deals accordingly.

He is just after all ;) And His ways are always perfect.